• I will not drop soggy tennis balls in the underwear of someone who is sitting on the toilet
• The sofa is not a face towel. Neither are human’s laps
• I will not roll on dead seagulls or fish
• I will stop eating kitty box crunchies
• Fetch and ‘Run around the yard with the ball with you chasing me’ is not the same game.
• I will not bark each time I hear a door bell on TV
• I will try to remember the Garbage Bin is not a Toy
• Be more selective in crotch sniffing endeavors
• I will not drool everytime you take a bite
• My head does not belong in the refrigerator, the dishwasher or shopping bags
• I will not roll my toys under the furniture
• The garbage man is NOT stealing our stuff
• After a Bath or walk in the rain make sure to shake the water out inside the house
• Even the score with neighborhood skunks
• Log more couch-time vs. floor-time
• I will not pass gas in front of friends or visitors
• Run after the ball only after it’s actually been thrown
• Prepare for Final Vacuum Battle
• Take time from busy schedule to stop and smell the behinds
• Grow opposable thumb; break into pantry; decide for MYSELF how much food is too much
• I will not obstruct my human from typing on the keyboard when my human is writing about me and other important xitpbeuxmeuemeictthhggg6453ncm.

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